Okay, so I was going to write another Creeper McCreeperson story, but first I thought I'd share something with you.
A good friend of mine, (who never reads this blog, so don't tell 'em...) posted this status four hours ago:
Anastasia Beaverhousin* thinks sprinkles are pretty much the greatest thing ever.
Let me explain why this wrong. Let's first examine what sprinkles are. They're made of sugar, cornstarch, vegetable oil, and food coloring.
Yummy.
Now, sprinkles have been described as life's confetti. I always hated confetti. Confetti gets everywhere. I went to a New Year's Party once, they had confetti. I found some in my toilet, three weeks later. (The party was not at my house, and it was not before I sat down...) Sure they make things look pretty- for half a second! Then they just lay there. Sure, thrown in the air adds a bit of glammor, but if they get wet, they stick to everything and then whatever color they were to turn that color. I don't like seeing purple pee! It ain't right.
Back to sprinkles. They are practically tasteless. They never all get on what you want, ya know? Your counter always has some that spilled on it. So you scoop your hand and slide it into your other, but you feel bad wasting it, so you put it on your cake anyways. Then when someone says their pretty frosting tastes a bit salty, you should just brush it off, and hope that they didn't get any of that cat food residue that was laying on the table before you started frosting.
Ten Ice Cream Toppings That Kick Sprinkles Ass
10. Chocolate Syrup
9. Carmel
8. Whipped Cream
7. Frosting, (Oh yeah, you should try it.)
6. Cherries
5. Fudge
4. Hot Fudge
3. Strawberries
2. A Candy Bar, (of your liking.)
1. Melted Peanut Butter
Sprinkles suck.
*Remember the whole name change thing? Was that Obvious enough?
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